New Delhi, June 14 (IANS) Increasing emotional dysfunctions and poor coping skills may be behind the rising trend in cases of women committing or fostering the murder of their husbands, said mental health experts on Saturday.

There is a rise in cases of intimate partner violence, especially those involving the female partner. From a planned honeymoon killing in Meghalaya to a dismembered body found sealed in a cement drum in Meerut, the wave of husband murders has sparked a fierce debate on the mental status of the women committing these ghastly murders.

“These crimes are not to be viewed as aggressor being men or women rather these are to be viewed as human tragedies resulting from emotional dysfunctions, unhealthy coping skills and impaired cognitions and judgement,” Dr Shiv Prasad, Professor, and Head, Dept of Psychiatry at Lady Hardinge Medical College, New Delhi, told IANS.

From Bengaluru techie Atul Subhash committing suicide last December and blaming his wife in a 1.5-hour-long video posted online to the recent case of Raja Raghuvanshi, who was murdered by his wife during their honeymoon trip in Meghalaya — the cases have attracted huge public attention. These have also triggered misogynistic backlash and are posing a threat to the idea of gender equality.

“It becomes important to address here that these events are not acts by empowered women but by a woman suffering from immense psychological dysfunction. These two concepts can’t be compared, and narrating empowered women as dangerous and emotionally unstable on one end jeopardises the long fight of gender equality, but on the other hand, it ignores the real underlying cause — psychological dysfunctions,” the psychiatrist said.

He added that these cases reflect the social and psychological shift with women being exposed to various economic, social, emotional, and even existential stressors. There is often a tug-of-war between partners for competence and power.

“These adverse events of violence result when personal vulnerabilities in the form of unresolved/untreated past trauma, personality traits like fear of abandonment, emotional dysregulation, reduced emotional tolerance, unrealistic expectations collide with factors like the feeling of betrayal or rejection, overwhelming family dynamics/responsibilities and perception of not living the ideal hypothesised life,” Prasad said.

With the changing landscape of the country, the concept of relationships is also changing, said experts.

“From joint family to nuclear family system, the thought process is also changing from we to me, which means initially we used to think about we, that is the society as large, but now it’s about me, that is I, me, and myself. So, there is a sense of selfishness and entitlement that I should get whatever I need,” Dr Rajiv Mehta, Vice Chairperson of Psychiatry, from a leading hospital in the national capital, told IANS.

He noted that the patience level of couples is decreasing, and added to that is a strong belief that we are clever enough and we are powerful enough that we can evade the law.

The experts noted that the crimes also highlight the fragility of modern relationships, which are over-influenced by digital glamourisation, look hyperconnected but deep down lack emotional connectivity, and are based on unrealistic expectations that usually don’t fit in the deep-rooted cultural and family dynamics, leading to instability in relationships.

“Nowadays, relationships are based on individualism rather than interdependence, reflections of a deficit in understanding the basic concept that relationship/marriage doesn’t just work with partners being the only role players rather it demands fitting in the complex family dynamics,” Prasad said.

–IANS

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